Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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