How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.