i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
