yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
