After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
