Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Randomize
