you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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