i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
