You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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