Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
