a bad idea.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
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i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
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You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been