Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
