just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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