were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
