me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
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The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
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I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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