I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
