I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
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Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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