Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
