i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
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Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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