But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
