You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
