If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize