You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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