btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize