At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
