What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Randomize
