She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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