I'm jealous of your bromance
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
This is the high leading the old right now
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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