I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
