What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
...so i touched it.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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