it's great music for shaving your balls
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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