I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
