her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
