I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize