We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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