he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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