HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
