I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
