Its about making memories worth repressing
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
