rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
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