did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
