You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
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What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.