She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
We need a shit load of segways right now
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