Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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