You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
And then he peed in my hair
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