I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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