She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
