Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
