UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So. Much. Porn.
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