check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
