Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
