There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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